How Can I Help My Child Learn to Practice Independently?

You can find an additional article about the skills needed for a student to practice independently here

Is your child ready to start practicing independently? Will it be a while before they practice alone, but you’re wondering how the process will work?

Helping our children learn to practice is important at any level!

Right now in my studio, I have a big group of late grade school and early middle school students, and we are starting to have many conversations in lessons about what it looks like to begin transitioning to independent practice.

Two points that I think are the most important to keep in mind:

First – always talk to your teacher before making this transition. Your teacher knows what skills will need to be in place before this transition can be successful and will help guide you. I talk to my students in a different way once they are practicing all on their own. I spend time to coach them through what they will need to keep in mind. So definitely bring it up before any significant changes.

In developmental psychology, there is a term called scaffolding that is a great way to think about this process. Scaffolding involves providing additional support for a task a child can almost do on their own. A task that is just beyond their reach.

This means we help just enough. Enough that they can be successful but that they are also the ones mostly completing the task at hand. Gradually, as the child can do more independently that additional support is removed. I think this is precisely how we want to transition to independent practice – little by little, with lots of support.

Here is what I don’t want it to look like when a child is learning to practice independently:

* A parent has been guiding practice for years, and suddenly a student is left to their own devices with no transition period.

*A student is told “go practice” but doesn’t really know what that means when there is not an adult telling them what to do.

*A parent takes their student’s lack of direction (or motivation to get started on their own) as a sign they don’t want to play their instrument anymore.

This is more of a “sink or swim” method, and we want to avoid it and instead help a student learn what we mean, and what they should do when we say “go practice.”

Here is what I see as a successful transition process to independent practice:

First: a younger child has been practicing with adult guidance and coaching for a while when this shift starts. The parent is the one to decide how to map out time, what to practice, and how to help improve things.

Second, in an ideal world, at the start of the shift to independent practice and long before the student is left to their own devices, the student will start to plan out practice with their parent. Maybe they plan for a week, perhaps for the day but discussing what to practice is a good start.

This planning involves lots of question asking: “What did your teacher want you to improve?” “How could you work on improving this?” and so on. This does take time, but it is not a waste of time.

We want our children to be able to plan out an effective practice plan for themselves when we’re no longer involved. Even if it’s as simple as “the teacher gave us this checklist and we’re going to go down it and check things off.” Getting in the habit of what it looks like to map out a practice session is so important. It is a skill that is learned, and we can help our children learn to do it well.

There can also be an intermediate step, where the student plans out practice and just explains to the parent what they have planned. Then they discuss any additional ideas about how to practice the assignments for the week well.

Eventually, the student makes the plan. They practice with the plan in mind and this helps them keep progressing forward.

The parent helps structure time and content for a while longer. But, starts to give more ownership and decision making over to their child.

As our children get older, they need us less as a “boss” and more as a coach.

As a parent its key to remember our job isn’t over, it’s just changing. Your child still needs you, it’s just starting to look different.

I think the most helpful way to look at it is that a significant shift happens where the parent is still needed for helping structure time and planning, but the student takes over the mental work of what and how to practice.

I hope this article has given you some perspective about what that transition may look like.

At first lots of support is needed as practice skills are developed. Then, little by little we hand over the responsibility until our children can be successful on their own and practice independently well.